Spirit + art + music + healing

Xöetza: An Online Spirit Culture Magazine

by Liv Mokai Wheeler

third edition: surrendering to the great mystery

third edition: surrendering to the great mystery

contents:

pilgrimages and panaceas: elemental edition abridged*: Poem by ionalí

a raindrop finding its way back to the ocean: LIv wheeler interviews kamala K. Brown

Awakening: Art and poetry by Kamala K. Brown

SPIRIT WALKER: Art and poetry by Kamala K. Brown

SHE WALKS IN BEAUTY: Art and Poetry by Natalie Zacharias

To Live Art in Every Way: A Message from the Beloved Kontomblé

pilgrimages and panaceas: elemental edition abridged* 

search onwards to march past waterfall to ash forest, 

forage pouchfuls of hair from a unicorn foal, 

but only after asking for permission first.

string these onto tuning forks or harps, maybe dulcimers, 

do play a song for the faeries, mind you. 

hear ethereal tunes bring luminosity into you. 

source upwards to grow past heavens to lights of aurora, 

pocket handfuls of her glowing essence, 

but only after asking for permission first.

stir this into porridge or whisky, maybe honey, 

do offer a bit to the elves, mind you.

watch otherworldly growth make you anew. 

seek outwards to see past mountain to pele’s abyss, 

garner armfuls of her scarlet lehua flowers,

but only after asking for permission first. 

braid them into crowns or hair, maybe anklets, 

do light a candle for the salamanders, mind you. 

sense magic incense waft your spirit back into view.

swim inwards to reach past cavern to mermaid hollow, 

gather pocketfuls of glistening scales of tails, 

but only after asking for permission first.

set them into looms or knitting needles, maybe embroidery, 

do bow your head to the selkies, mind you. 

feel miraculous blessings remind you of what’s true.

such pilgrimages, such panaceas, are time tested few:  

if you sup earth, air, fire, water, elemental dew, 

we vow that you’ll find life within our fastidious alchemical zoo. 

(but only after asking for permission first.)

*for antidotes of ancient alba, pagan poetry, seaworthy superstitions, and zeals of Zeus, see the unabridged edition 

ionalí

a raindrop finding its way back to the ocean: LIv wheeler interviews kamala K. Brown

Liv: Kamala, it is an honor to connect with you. I've loved experiencing your sound healing as well as your artistic spiritual transmissions. I sense your great soul depths as well as your majestic, starry expansiveness. Spirit brings my attention to you as a child. Did you have a strong connection with the stars when you were a child?

Kamala: It is such an honor to connect with you also, and I feel deep gratitude that you “see” and sense me. I am going with the flow on answering the question as though we are sitting on a mountain top having a chat....

My first memory is getting out of bed one night (and I must have been small as it felt like quite a task) and going to the window. The ledge was higher than my head but I managed to pull back the net curtain to look up at the moon. I remember looking at my hands and arms and having a strong feeling of the strangeness of my human body. As an adult, I can put words to this felt sense being, “What is this? Why am I here?”

I’ve always felt a strong connection to a bandwidth not so obvious in this world. Lighter, blended. A sense that this planet is very new to me, and separation is a very new experience. This has meant a lot of homesickness, and I have found myself throughout my life saying (and still do on challenging days) that I want to go home.

As an adult I’ve come to realize that this connection to a wider bandwidth, is linked to my biological mother trying to commit suicide when she was pregnant with me. It is most likely that my soul jumped to other bandwidths to be safe. I now see my biological mother was chosen to support my connection to a wider bandwidth, and in particular, that it would be felt strongly and remembered.

It’s been a long road to get to this understanding and knowing, and I’d like to say it’s been a graceful journey - but it wasn’t. As I like to remind myself - like a raindrop finding its way back to the ocean my path is crooked, it is the straightest route.

Liv: “…like a raindrop finding its way back to the ocean my path is crooked, it is the straightest route.” Wow, that is so beautiful, Kamala. Thank you for sharing your heart. I experience waves of chills as I receive what you're sharing. I'm so sorry to hear about your mom trying to commit suicide when she was pregnant with you. What a blessing that she didn't succeed. I find it remarkable that you have the greater soul understanding that your biological mother was chosen to support your connection to a wider bandwidth.

In the past year especially, I've heard so many spirits speak about the importance of healing sound-waves, of sound priestesses. They share about this era that we've shifted into, that the medicine is largely sound and spirit influenced. When I first came to your website and felt the energy, I thought to myself, this is what they've been talking about. The energy they've been sharing with me, it feels like the way I experience your sound healing, as well as the beings that I experience in your sacred art. When I listened/felt the track that's on the home page of your website, I felt like I was hearing lightened/enlightened beings speaking about this transition that we're going through on earth and sharing supportive guidance. It felt comforting, soothing, emotional, and profound.

In this bandwidth that you speak about, do you experience it as a particular dimension?

Kamala: Understanding what comes through me sometimes feels like trying to see my own nose without a mirror. It can be very tiring for my mind, so instead I rest with feeling it. It’s really beautiful to read your words and have some context to what is coming through - my mind feels much happier- thank you. 

When I play the crystal bowls and paint, I move with what I am drawn to - and I feel guided.  I hear which bowl wants to be played, when I paint my hand is drawn to a colour, and even when my cognitive mind thinks I have made a ‘mistake,’ (when painting or playing), I later understand it was in fact required to create the image or sound. It is a humbling process of letting go and receiving. 

When I first felt drawn to painting, I thought that each needed to be a tangible separate piece of art - it turned out very different in practice. Instead, it’s a process of layering on the same canvas. Each painting only lives for a couple of minutes. Once I take a photograph of the image that comes through, I am guided to pour paint over it and create something new. Colours of the ‘old’ painting come through on the next one and so there is an interplay, a blending, they have their own will as such, and I never know what will come through. Letting go of each painting is an important part of the process (for me personally) showing the impermanence of everything, how everything is connected and how everything that comes before informs the now. I often feel overwhelmed with tears when painting because I know that I could not, by myself, create anything like that. My crown is tingling as I write this. I feel it is a partnership and it humbles me to be an instrument (and I just heard, of peace).  

Like I said the straightest route is crooked - so I come back to your question! The partnership I feel is an interplay of different dimensions. I feel it’s useful to explain my connection with a wider bandwidth to give this context. I guess translated, my connection is the awareness or perception of many dimensions occupying the same space (the wider bandwidth). There is no particular dimension or beings or collective that I experience when the sound comes through me, or the art, as they seem to permeate each other - so it is difficult to differentiate. I will try to explain this (which is very difficult in words) but let’s take Metatron’s cube as an example. It holds all (physical) patterns of creation, and it is perception and shifts in perception that allow one to focus on specific ‘parts’ of it. So it exists as a whole and as separate forms but each ‘part’ (dimension) permeates other ‘parts’ (dimension). I’m not sure if this is a great example, it’s challenging to describe using concepts (which are mind constructs) for something that exists outside of concepts. Apologies, but it’s the best way I can explain with the tools I have. 

I have a deep feeling that the sound and images are a thread (of many) running/connecting all dimensions and the space that holds it all. As I said it’s difficult to explain and my mind can fall into trying to understand but generally ends up chasing its tail….so I come to rest back at just playing the bowls and painting the art work that comes through (the kindest option toward myself). I try to allow it to be received as it will by the receiver. I prefer not to explain it on my own website because I don’t feel my mind can truly understand or explain it (but I do here as you have asked). Instead use concepts and words that people have more of a relationship with.  \

I hope this helps explain it,  I have tried to answer the best I can at this time.  

So much gratitude to you, Liv, for asking the question. I feel peaceful in understanding a little more, and also that it is unfolding regardless without me having to understand.

Liv: I love hearing about your process, Kamala. As I feel what you're expressing, I experience kaleidoscopic beauty of experience. I love the ways you trust, your ability to let go and be with the fluidity of existence. I experience your voice, itself, as healing, wise and as a deeply trustworthy guide. For those that are feeling called to experience sound healing with you, is it always at the new and full moon that you gather?

Kamala: Liv, Your words are like warmth to my being. I feel seen- thank you.

I feel called at this time to offer the sound transmissions on the new and full moons. I am being asked to offer them as private groups and one to one sessions, which I am open to offer if it feels right and the bowls are happy to do so which they generally are!

This process of answering questions has been very healing for me and I’m so honored to walk with you on this earth at this time. This gratitude extends to the amazing beings that I’m supported by. It’s as though they as a collective family hold the space for the sound and art to come through. Feeling very blessed and humbled that they chose little old me.

Liv: Thank you so much, Kamala! I'm very honored to walk with you on earth at this time as well. Thank you for allowing your medicine to come through so graciously. It is felt... With love, Liv

For more information about Kamala: https://centredsoul.com/ and Instagram

Awakening

I awaken

to unnoticed parts within me

to inner tides

to our cycles within cycles

I awaken to the ability to deeply sense, feel, hear, to see

beyond the limits of what has been taught

I awaken to the noticing of being breathed

the stillness that contains the breath

the peace of my beating heart

I awaken to ever flowing moments,

whispering

that I am held and safe.

Art and Poetry by Kamala K. Brown. For more information about Kamala: https://centredsoul.com/ and Instagram

Spirit Walker

movement without taking a step

seeing with eyes closed

hearing not from the ears

feeling beyond the edges of the skin

talking without spoken word

come walk with me...

Art and Poetry by Kamala K. Brown. For more information about Kamala: https://centredsoul.com/ and Instagram

She Walks in Beauty

She walks in beauty

With every step she takes

She walks in beauty

With every breath she makes

She walks in beauty

Flowers blossom with each step 

She walks in beauty

Watered by the tears she has wept

She walks in beauty

Everywhere she goes

She walks in beauty

Harmony always follows

Art and Poetry by Natalie Zacharias. For more information about Natalie: https://tendingyourspirit.com/ and Instagram

we look forward to sharing our next edition of Xöetza: An Online Spirit Culture Magazine soon. IN THE MEANTIME, WE SEND LOVE TO YOU!