(continued from newsletter)

One of the great many blessings that Elder Malidoma bestowed upon me is to help me to awaken to the knowing/gnowing that the Kontomblé have always been with me. He and I knew each other from a place much vaster than this and clearly made very detailed spiritual agreements which continue to reveal themselves.

Elder Malidoma saw things in me as he has done with so many around the earth that have supported a profound awakening to what’s most real. We remain in communication, in a more pure way, as he’s now in the realm of the ancestors. He continues to guide and help me to make sense of an inverted reality.

One of the many soul wounds that I’ve been working to heal in my life is the shame of being human. It is so deep. My sense is it likely was originally inserted from a not so kind galactic being that loathes the human being.

It was passed down to me from my mother and my father. If I spoke in any number of ways I was intensely criticized. It was easier to remain silent.

I know ultimately my parents love my dearly. I also love them dearly. They received this poison from their parents as well.

my parents on their wedding day

I internalized much of my experience and continued my journey through life as a highly sensitive soul that felt so much and said so little.

Yet on some level I knew I was here to heal and also to support the healing of the collective.

Being called up on the stage in Taiwan when I was a child.

I am so grateful that I mustered up the courage at some point to delve into my healing.

I am so grateful that I gathered enough courage to say yes to my medicine.

It was around about 2003 that both were initiated in earnest. 21 years ago. 

For the past 21 years I’ve been delving into my personal healing from nearly any and every natural and ancient modality I’m aware of. I believe all of them have worked in their unique ways. Subtle ways, surprisingly so, I’ve found to be some of the most deeply effective.

For about the past 19 years I’ve been supporting others healing in so many creative ways. 

I believe I would have remained in a 1 on 1 private healing practice if it weren’t for the consistent nudging of Elder Malidoma to truly step into my medicine.

I wanted to stay safe. 

However, the visions that he shared with me would nearly always catalyze a stored up grief to release. Like the undamming of the great waters.

I knew it was true what he saw in me on some level. With trembling knees and a shaky voice I kept finding a way to go forwards

I was heartened along the way by all of the messages that I received from other deeply sensitive souls that it was giving them courage to step into their medicine. That continued to attune me to an awareness that it was for something much greater than the little me.

Yes as everyone is well aware by now the ‘witch wound’ is deep.

Could it be so deep and so unconscious that it would activate an ancestral wound of so many people turning on each other in order to “save their souls”?

What kind of maze are we in currently?

I am soooo grateful that I conjured the courage when I did, shaky knees and voice trembling to say yes to my medicine.

For the past 4 years I’ve been going through a great inner initiation. I honor Dr. Joe Dispenza for being a voice of sanity in the madness. 

When so many people are shouting at once my heart tells me it’s time to be quiet and listen.

I’ve been guided in the past 4 years to largely listen. I’ve been listening to so many voices. I’ve been listening to my inner voice. I’ve been listening to so many interviews from people from so many walks of life. 

I’ve been listening deeply to the aspects of my soul. I’ve been remembering. I’ve been actively engaging the process of awakening.

Because that’s what I’ve been knowing somehow internally is when the cultural ‘norm’ becomes ‘canceling’ voices clearly it’s time to retreat into a greater knowing.

For me that’s a clear signal that it’s time to retreat from the herd mentality and to attune to something truly loving and pure.

The truth that my heart wishes to speak right now is this…

I am Liv Mokai Wheeler. I, like so many of you, am here to support liberation. True liberation, I believe, is true love. Love liberates. 

I believe we all hold very important keys.

photo credit: Heather Adams Photography

photo credit: Christianne VanWijk

The way that I’ve been guided in the past 4 years is rather than speak about it, be it.

When I witnessed what seemed to be so much frenetic activity in the virtual ‘realities’ of the interwebs where people seemed to be bullied or bullying others into wearing particular badges to show that they weren’t the perpetrator I felt called simply to witness.

I sat and I listened internally and the more I meditated the more I loved meditating.

I weeped and I loved quietly.

I remembered true love is complete love. I remembered what loving myself fully feels like. I’m remembering how to love humanity completely, not only parts of it.

This love comes in waves. It’s a process. I’m steadily weaving it and remembering it and being remembered by it.

This, I believe, is the love that liberates. I’m remembering how to not need or expect or want from others. I’m remembering that everyone EVERYONE deserves love.

I believe ultimately we’re being remembered by the Great Mother currently. At least I know that’s what I’m experiencing.

I’ve remembered I’m not here to change anyone. From a greater consciousness I’ve remembered I love you just as you are.

With a heart of immense gratitude,

Liv Mokai Wheeler